Posts Tagged ‘Tupac’


Are you a street savvy “bad boy” who loves rap and dreams of becoming a hip hop legend like Tupac Shakur?

If so, a major record company is looking for you.

Physical requirements:

  • White/Caucasian
  • Early 20’s (no older than 25)
  • Between 5′ 8 and 6′ 1
  • Model-type, athletic
  • Well-tanned
  • Short hair (ex: Channing Tatum)
  • Body tattoos (no face tattoos)

Looking for someone with natural swag, street smarts, and good looks who feels comfortable rapping about street life while appealing to a 12-17 year old white female demographic. Must know street slang and speak with “flavor”. Rapping experience a plus but not required. Must be a team player as you will be working closely with a group of songwriters, vocal coaches, and image consultants.

If this sounds like you, please submit the following:

  • A short video explaining why you think you should be selected
  • 2 to 3 pictures (including headshot and full-body shot)
  • Links to music and/or videos (if available)

Email your material to

Deadline is March 15, 2015.

Good luck!

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ATTENTION: This is satire. However, given the state of the music business, give it a few more months and this may become a reality.

The email address listed above is real. I initially wanted to use “” as an address but it was already taken. The irony!  Of course, if someone actually submits their material, I may just be sharing it in a forthcoming article.  Stay tuned. This could get ugly.

This article can also be found at